Every software engineer knows how frustrating it is to work with broken tools. That system dealing with expense reports? Ouch! That other system for time reporting? Oh dear…

Since you cannot avoid these systems, you cannot avoid the pain [1]. The solution? The remote rag doll + pain suite. The idea is simple - companies delivering this kind of software are obliged (by law) to ship an internet connected rag doll to your office. This rag doll has sensors everywhere (yes, including the groin). The twist? Wait for it…

On the other side of the world, a poor developer - working for the company delivering that crappy piece of **** - is forced to jump into the aforementioned pain suite. The pain suite has an intricate web of motors, pistons, weights etc. attached to it that will react to external forces applied to the internet connected rag doll. Kicking the rag doll in the butt? You guessed right - the suite will deliver a sensation of someone kicking the wearer.

IT’S AS SIMPLE AS THAT. Who’s in?

[1] Well, you can always build your own proxy on top of it (scraping web pages since 1999, yes?)